Pontoon Eyes*

I have noticed a freaky new phenomenon in the UAE of late. A significant amount of people are wearing coloured contact lenses.

Now, I'm not going to pretend that I'm against changing what nature gives you. Anyone who saw my hair through the "blonde years" will testify to that (especially my sister who wasn't really expecting me to turn up for her wedding as Eminem!). However, I have one specific problem with this new trend...

They scare the bejesus out of me!

You see, as far as I am concerned, the presence of freakishly light irises signifies not that you are some hyper-cool scenester, but that you have been bitten by one of the "mobile deceased". Basically, you look like a zombie.

To prove my point, here are several pictures, some are adverts for the coloured lenses and some are the undead. See if you can tell the difference?

Number one

Number two

Number three

Number four

Number five

Number six

Number seven

Number eight

Number nine

* From the classic northern expression, "He's got Pontoon Eyes, that lad! One sticks while the other one twists!"